Several years ago, a friend told me about NextTribe, an online magazine for “Women Aging Boldly”. Without hesitation, I signed up for their newsletter. (They had me at “bold’!) While I enjoyed reading their articles, I didn’t pay much attention to their trips…until I saw their ad for Dìa de los Muertos (Day of the Dead) in San Miguel Allende, Mexico.
So many things quickly came together: 1) I’d been intrigued with the festival since the opening scene in the 2015 James Bond movie Spectre.  2) The city is a UNESCO World Heritage Site.  3) Traveling with a group of like-minded women appealed to my feminist ethos.  4) And, as a widow, I could do something special to honor my late husband.

How could I resist? I signed up, then asked my friend Katherine if she was interested and, just like that, I got myself a roommate.

Cultural differences

Here, in the states, Hallowe’en is all about pumpkins, candy, and costumes; the two days that follow, November 1 and 2 (Catholic All Saints and All Souls Days), are not widely acknowledged.  In Mexico those days are a VERY big deal.  I was particularly curious about the mystical connection Mexicans have toward spirits and the rituals they use to commune with their departed loved ones.

As it turned out, everything about the trip, including the cultural education, was wonderful and exceeded my expectations.

Our home base

The Casa Calderoni B&B was beautiful and conveniently located. We had the entire building to ourselves, giving us a feeling of security and lots of freedom.  It felt like a sorority house.  Leave your door open while you hang out in your room?  Come to breakfast in your PJs? No problem!

Our group

The two Jeannies who run the trips were accommodating and fun, and the whole group got along exceptionally well.  Coming from all over the USA, we basically started as strangers who had only met on a Zoom call. Many, like me, brought a friend; some came alone. Over the week, we talked a lot, learned a lot, toured, ate, drank, shopped, danced, laughed, and cried together.  By the end of the trip, we actually became our own “bold tribe” with an active group chat and a shared photo album (many of their great pics are included in this story).

A full itinerary: history, art, and culture

NextTribe kept us busy—on the move during the day and socializing at fine restaurants each night, most with breathtaking rooftop views of the city.  We enjoyed two guided tours by local people who explained San Miguel’s notable origins and its important role in Mexican independence.  (Check out the namesake Ignacio Allende.)

Despite lively nightlife, a rich art scene, and national attention, the city has preserved its quaint historic beauty. Walking through the town center is like walking through a theme park or movie set, picturesque in every aspect:  lush greenery, cobblestone streets, multi-colored sidewalks, jewel-toned colonial or baroque buildings.  In fact, zoning laws mandate that the building facades in el centro can only be painted the colors of the original stones in the sidewalks.  The main plaza, El Jardìn, is surrounded by neatly trimmed trees and dominated by La Parroquia de San Miguel Arcángel, a towering church that serves as a navigational point of reference.  Of course, for the directionally challenged, GPS was still helpful.

We visited this iconic landmark, plus every other important building, well-known church, chapel, or convent—testaments to their strong Catholic heritage.

We saw impressive “Day of the Dead” altars all over town and toured the local cemetery to learn about the observances, customs, and meaning of the artifacts associated with this annual event. The altars commonly had flowers, photos, candles, cultural symbols, and mementos of things the deceased enjoyed during their lives. (Click the photos for full effect.)

The “Day of the Dead” decorations (orange marigolds, skulls, skeletons, white-faced figures) were also in every doorway and store window, adding extra pops of color, almost to the point of visual overload. Walking on all the uneven stones slowed us down, which was fine because at every point, every turn, we wanted to stop to take pictures. It was a continuous “Oooh! Wow! Click. Click.”  Here are some of the eye-popping doors and windows.

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Up close and personal

We spent a more intimate, personal evening at local artist Suzy Taylor’s gallery where she displays her paintings, furniture, and clothing. And, we were treated to a glorious day at the beautiful Santa Emilia Ranch for a charro (think Mexican rodeo) demonstration and a sumptuous lunch. Both places were owned and operated by gracious and accomplished women who invited us into their lovely, art-filled homes and shared their life stories, becoming honorary tribe members.

More history and shopping

A second day trip took us to see the 250-year-old Santuario Atotonilco, another UNESCO World Heritage Site, which is (deservedly) known as Mexico’s Sistine Chapel for its highly decorated ceilings, walls, and statuary.  We followed its numerous “Kodak moments” with serious retail therapy at the Galeria Atotonilco and then had much-needed downtime:  lunch and a leisurely soak in the mineral hot springs at La Gruta.

By the end of the week, we also visited the marvelous Fabrica Aurora, a repurposed textile factory that now houses a multitude of talented artists and artisans, and went to the local craft market to buy gifts and decorations for our own altar. We left all these places smiling, although many pesos lighter.

Three big nights

October 31. You could feel the pace pick up throughout the town.  The crowds grew with more public altars and more people in costume. The streets filled with vendors selling flowers, makeup, trinkets, tokens for the altars and the upcoming parade. That night, families brought their children to the town center for their version of “trick or treat”.  People gave them small change instead of candy. You saw more skeletons and skull faces than Marvel heroes and Disney princesses.

November 1. After an active day at Atotonilco, we assembled our own altar in our B&B with the photos and mementos we brought with us and the flowers and decorations the trip leaders provided. One by one, we spoke of our loved ones who have passed, shared memories and tears.  One woman made beaded bracelets for the entire group, another gave us each a Sugar Skull charm, and yet another brought home-made cookies as a special remembrance.  It was a unique experience—somber, heartfelt, bonding.  That night at dinner, we were quieter and (I am sure) felt much more connected.

November 2. We had our food brought in while we sat in our dining area to get our faces painted by local makeup artists.  These gifted women managed to match our chosen costumes and created sixteen different facial designs.  We were all La Calavera Catrinas!   We felt magical as we joined the parade, proudly walking (or floating) in front of a mariachi band.

The spirits were joyously with us. People repeatedly asked to take our picture, pose with us for selfies. We were noticed.  We were seen…and appreciated, which is not common for women of our age.  The revelry continued at a nearby restaurant with a DJ whose house-style music kept us out of our seats, dancing, and entertaining the crowd. Even the Mexican-version of the Golden Bachelor joined in.  Oh, what a night!

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The best part

Way beyond the beautiful city and its “Day of the Dead” celebration was the friendship and support our group shared.  The vibe throughout the week was BOLD WOMEN; it was validating and empowering. Katherine and I now have fourteen new friends. The group chat continues. People are still sharing photos.  We talk about meeting again on another NextTribe trip.

Thank you, to all the women who made this adventure so wonderful.  May the spirits continue to guide us. ♥ ♥ ♥

Learn more

• • NextTribe
  • Spectre opening scene (YouTube)
  • Casa Calderoni
  • Ignacio Allende
  • Parroquia de San Miguel Arcángel
  • Templo de Nuestra Señora de la Salud
  • Sanctuary of Atotonilco
  • La Gruta spa
  • Suzy Taylor gallery
  • Fabrica Aurora
  • Charro: The Mexican Cowboy
  • How ‘La Catrina’ became the iconic symbol for the Day of the Dead